Practicing Presence.
This is a superskill that improves every part of business, from making sales to writing copy and even creating products.
If I could impart one lesson to you that you carry with you, it’s this. Here’s a (very short) list of what presence makes easier:
Connecting with potential clients online
Writing your emails, blog posts, sales pages, really any writing
Delivering on the value you sold to your clients
Increasing the likelihood of positive reviews
Creating work you’re really proud of that is high-value and contributes to your revenue goals
Evolving into your best business self
Sounds amazing, right? Let’s dive into it.
Most problems in business can be traced back here.
Nearly every client I coach comes to me looking for the HOW. And looking for the HOW means that your brain is offline. Really. I want you to really hear that. Sit with it. This thought of, “How do I do ______________?” usually reveals that you are not feeling very safe or present in the NOW. And listen, there is A LOT in the world to startle you, and more to startle you when you enter the entrepreneurial world. I get this. But this won’t change. So, we adapt. I honestly think that if we could learn this skill then there would be much less need for all the stuff out there that people create that only works for 1% of people because it was a strategy that was designed by them for them, and it’s not going to be right for you. If you have presence, even if you do work with a consultant, you can essentially partner on the process because what you’re looking for is support in where YOUR BRAIN decides it wants to go because your brain is online, not offline. Most of the strategy out there is directly related to trying to sell peace and safety to a scared brain because a scared brain thinks it needs something out there to feel better in here. But what it needs is YOU to offer it safety, peace, sufficiency, and to do that you’ve got to practice presence.
What is Presence?
Presence is being awake and aware and IN THIS MOMENT from a place of openness and neutrality.
Bringing your full attention to whatever is happening right now, rather than dwelling on the past or future.
Noticing and experiencing physical sensations, sights, sounds, thoughts, and emotions as they arise, without judgment.
Being grounded in and mindful of your immediate circumstances and environment.
Letting go of distracting thoughts and returning your focus to the here-and-now experience.
Feeling a sense of aliveness, centeredness, and connection to the present reality.
Presence is looking someone in the eye and engaging them fully and with attention. It’s asking your partner or friend how they are and not checking out as they share. It’s being in a meeting with a client and actually having space in your body to contemplate what they’re saying and respond. It’s also a very important foundation for creating great writing because connected writing, where the human reading actually feels like you are speaking to them, is effective.
If you want to write effective emails, blog posts and sales pages, get present.
Imagine this: you sit down to write and you’re able to easily get the words out. You’re calm. You’re excited, you’re actually knowledgable! This is very different than it usually goes when your mind snaps back into the past where you’re standing in front of your 5th grade class feeling absolutely humiliated because you clammed up and couldn’t read your book report aloud. For most of us, these memories are going to have an effect on us, but we aren’t meant to stop evolving or living a big life because of them.
Once you learn how to practice presence, and offer your fearful brain some safety and sufficiency, you’ll find your way back to NOW. To the task at hand, and the good news is that you sharing an email or writing a blog post is not the same as being that 10 year old girl who didn’t have all she needed to create emotional safety. You’re a grown woman who has a say in her own emotional experience. And because of that people end up loving reading what you write, and they respond.
Ideas for practicing presence daily so that it comes easier to you.
Get back into your body
Move. Shake your arms out. Relax your jaw. Breathe more deeply.
Be IN every conversation
No matter who you’re talking to, practice really being THERE. Whether it’s at the supermarket checkout or in your personal relationships, notice when you want to check out and check back in. Often checking out might mean that you’re low on capacity, so instead of checking out maybe you just honestly excuse yourself for a moment.
When you’re writing, imagine you’re speaking to just one person out there.
Often, when I’m writing, I am imagining one of my clients in particular. I think about being in conversation with her and then when I’m writing it actually flows better and I get better writing done in less time. I also enjoy it more, too. When I think about everyone, my body tends to tense up and freeze. But when I realize that I’m speaking to someone I care about who wants to learn what I have to teach, it takes me back to being present.
In conclusion, practicing presence is practical for better business and a better life overall.
At its heart, presence is about living in this very moment, which is the only moment we actually have. So, it’s about living more fully.
