Getting your photo taken is practice in self-acceptance, self-love, and growth.
At our first Creative Shift Retreat (Mountain & Sea) I’m flying in a fellow expat friend to photograph our week. Here’s why.
This is Irem. You will no doubt realize how beautiful she is.
And even she has negative self talk that comes out during our shoots.
The older sister in me wants to scold her, tell her that when she looks back at these she will regret saying something unkind about her features, her body.
But I don’t do that. What I do instead is gently remind her that we are on a brave and curious journey together. I take the next photo.
I ask her to take a deep breath, to close her eyes. To imagine a scene, to embody that character and see herself in that way.
It makes shooting so much more fun.
Yesterday, Irem and I wandered around the landscape looking for really interesting places to take my clients for my first international retreat. We found spectacular places. We climbed rocks and ducked behind plants and picked fruit. We strolled by the pool and we petted cats. We had a lot of fun.
I once had a photographer tell me that she refused to take photos of me unless I stopped speaking negatively about myself during our shoots.
It stopped me in my tracks. I listened. That was 4 years ago. I no longer have the same negative body image I had before.
I’m still working on it, of course. I wish I was ‘cured’ but I’m aware and gentle and sometimes I require the support of my coach and all times I require the support of my self.
In this image-driven world, where our businesses live and grow and die on Instagram, how do we incorporate images but not further damage our self image?
That’s the beautiful thing. If we remain aware, we don’t have to take the bait of perfectionism. We can see how sinister it is. But we much remain vigilant.
In my photo sessions, I have rules.
Bodily awareness
Kindness to self
Calming of the nervous system when it’s required
Thought awareness
No negative self-talk
I will not engage in body shaming, ageism, perfectionism
We make them fun, or at least deep and meaningful and rich
I allow my clients to see a few photos to just understand the relationship of their body in space, but not so that we can critique their bodies and strive for perfectionism
This is why we have photo sessions. Because you can love yourself more during this process. You can connect with nature, with your body, with the embodied experience you are having. Because later, you will look back on these and remember what a beautiful human you are on this earth.
Any photographer who makes you feel bad about your body or any client who makes you feel bad about your photos is probably not operating with a strong sense of self love and human care.
The most beautiful photos, in my opinion (and of course anyone gets to have their opinion) are photos where you can feel your emotion and that emotion is one that makes your lived life more vibrant and real and rich. It can be sadness. Or worry. Or lightness. Or determination. Maybe even anger. Many times it’s peace and acceptance and love.
Get your photo taken.
It’s a most beautiful practice in self-love and getting into your body.
xoxo
Steph
